Safety - whose responsibility?

[TheDeSade]

I disagree. In a properly designed situation, the sub is always given a way to signal distress. I will agree that it is the dominants responsibility to design and manage the scene properly, and that includes making those provisions and plans.

[slave327-834-200]

In a properly designed situation, the sub is always given a way to signal distress. I will agree that it is the dominants responsibility to design and manage the scene properly, and that includes making those provisions and plans.

I agree with you here, where the safe word cannot be spoken other signals must be discussed before hand. Something Master and I have used in the past is the holding of an object, a ball works well, in one hand which I am able to drop if in distress. This works well in situations where hand signals might not be seen as quickly as needed.
However, I would say that the responsibility is totally equal before play when discussing safety during the scene, i would never start a scene without knowing how i will be able to stop it if needed and its as much my responsibility to ask those questions before hand.
During a scene things do change and the Doms job, apart from the obvious, is to look for signs through-out. Master has explained to me the pressure, for want of a better word, of always being switched on and aware of everything happening and I understand how difficult than can be.
The sub also holds as much responsibility to be honest and to use safewords or signs when needed, never mind the worry of "disappointing" their Dom if they do so.

[master 327-834-200]

I agree with you here, where the safe word cannot be spoken other signals must be discussed before hand. Something Master and I have used in the past is the holding of an object, a ball works well, in one hand which I am able to drop if in distress. This works well in situations where hand signals might not be seen as quickly as needed.
However, I would say that the responsibility is totally equal before play when discussing safety during the scene, i would never start a scene without knowing how i will be able to stop it if needed and its as much my responsibility to ask those questions before hand.
During a scene things do change and the Doms job, apart from the obvious, is to look for signs through-out. Master has explained to me the pressure, for want of a better word, of always being switched on and aware of everything happening and I understand how difficult than can be.
The sub also holds as much responsibility to be honest and to use safewords or signs when needed, never mind the worry of "disappointing" their Dom if they do so.

Of course I whole heartedly agree with everything my slave has said here and would only add that no one is so experienced that they can see or predict every eventuality. For that reason alone safety is serious and should never been seen as a weakness in someones commitment or technique. Personally if I was with someone who didn't use a safeword I would not play.