Now a quick post script bitch:

I carried them out, and I could see your confusion, but I just shook my head.

This needs to be adjusted. Remember to say it short and don't throw in extra words. You also don't need the comma next to the conjuction "and" in this case. I thought of offering something here, but I think you are good enough to think of a better way to put this. Also, get rid of "just".

I close the door, but not completely, because we had established the rules before this had begun, let me list them here again as a reminder

This was particularly akward because it appeared as if you were not speaking to her but writing out a list for her - the list was a part of the story.

Done for now. And remember that it was Aussiegirl who told me to be mean.

All joking aside; it's good. A few refinements would make to very good.