Hello and welcome to the Block, Mishka :-)

Bravo! on your first assignment. As Rhabbi already mentioned, your characterization of Christine is very good. You quickly paint a vivid image of her.

There are a couple of technical faults here and there, but I'll leave Muse to discuss those with you. The one criticism I will make is, your transition from Christine's reverie to Tom's return is very abrupt. I had to read this line twice:

Thank goodness, she thought, when Tom walked in just as her back started to sweat on the sheets.

The first time I read it, I thought it was a continuation of the reverie. An easy way to fix this is to precede that line with something that alerts the reader of a scene change -- from Christine's thoughts back to the room in which she's tied. The story tended to gallop from there to the end as well

I really loved this line:

When you’re on your hands and knees getting a good fuck from behind and suddenly have your big brother’s face in your head, well that ends things pretty quick.

It made me really feel your character's thoughts. Well done, and I look forward to reading more from you.

anonymouse