It's fascinating what rules couples set in order to feel "faithful" while playing the field. You, if I understand rightly, have vanilla sex with otherloves but you'd feel unfaithful if you subbed to them: contrariwise, we reckon it's OK for me to dom other women so long as I don't fuck them (and anything goes with men). One of my subs tells me that he and his wife have an agreement that he can play with men and she can play with women.

I look forward to hearing other people's rules.