So I have hit my three week mark at being here. I have to say that before coming here I didnt even realize that there was such a thing as being a dominate or a submissive, I knew that BDSM existed, but what that entailed I didnt really know.
What I have been doing though is exploring the Domme side of me, which I find to be a really fascinating experience. To have some one call me Miss and to have them give to me of themselves in such an open way makes me appreciate them more.
It does sometimes take me a while to switch back into being a dominate once I have been in my submissive role. Although going from my dominate role to a submissive one only takes the appearance of someone to whom I feel really submissive. when this first happened I was very confused, I had never felt such a thing before and I was thinking to myself, why do I feel this way towards "this" person, or "that" person and whenever these select people are around I find it hard not to act that way. At first I got mad at myself for feeling that way, but after a few days of reflecting on it I just decided, I am here to learn about BDSM and being submissive is part of that, even when it seems that my mind and body disagree with each other. so I decided to ask someone to help me explore those feelings further and it has only been a week since he agreed and yet I fall into being submissive towards him more easilly then ever.
It still is rather confusing to me to have two so separate sides to myself, each strong in its own way. The journey continues........