All by myself...

[leah06]

I agree with Ravenbounduptight that the things you do to yourself can give you an idea of sensations, but not of the experience of Domination and submission. Reading, or watching kinky porn if that's up your alley, is more likely to help you understand your emotional reaction to the idea of submission. But, listen to Denu, who is very wise. The stories are about what, in general, floats your boat, and what those submissive or Dominant emotions might be like. They are NOT blueprints or even vague sketches of real life. Don't be alarmed at things that seem extreme - if they're extreme for you, but you like the general idea, then you'll do something less extreme. But more important, don't be seduced by extreme things that seem very exciting to you. Your fantasies are more likely to be excited by the thought of, say, flaying than your actual experience would be. And, as a newcomer, if your fantasies are excited by the idea of 24/7 TPE Master/slave... don't. Take a lot of time before you let anyone control you.

Not that you seem to need advice to be cautious, but still. There's a lot of sub frenzy out there, and Dom frenzy too one would imagine, so just be aware.

[sub_nia]

What part of bdsm turns you on? When you fantasize, what side do you see yourself being on? I don't know how you would experiment on yourself with the dominant side, but you can always see if you like the pain aspect of being a sub. I always knew I was submissive, but at first I tried to fight it. LOL... that's how stubborn I am!

[BabyNightOwl]

I understand where you're coming from as a newbie myself. It's one thing to admit and accept that you have such desires to yourself but to actually trust someone to help you take the first steps into that world and not lead you astray takes great strength.

As for mastrabatory efforts, I recommend setting aside time for it before you just jump to it as any number of interruptions can pop up. Oils, toys and videos are always helpful as well.