Learning to be a better dom?

[Mezza]

Well, to tie fancy knots and such, go to both Twisted Monk's rope site (10 good videos) and Two Knotty Boys (many many... many videos. All free to download and view and review.

As for impact, or any other kinds of actual play, I highly recommend going to some local munches, meeting people, going to demos, labs, and parties and learn by doing and watching. There's nothing faster for exciting the imagination and stimulating your desire and ability to learn.

Thanks a lot for the rope sites! Those should help a lot.
I've considered going to demos, or actually see if I could get some types of short period "training", but I'm kinda uncertain with the safety level these activities involve, or the trustworthiness of the participants. Yea I'm a bit paranoid with that....

~

My lover/Master taught me to test impact toys on my inner forearm, to get an initial feel, so you could start with that.
He is a switch, and the first time I tried to top him, it was a disaster. He is a completely different sub from me, so when I did what I would have wanted, it brought him right out of sub-space. I am telling you this to stress communication. You say you are happy with her topping, but that does not guarantee that she wants to be topped the same way. Yes, go to munches and such to learn how to do things, but talk with her to learn what to do.
One other suggestion I have seen, that I may try, is to write yourself a "script." It doesn't have to be detailed, and you can stray from it, obviously, but it can save you from freezing up, asking yourself, "Oh, god(s), what do I do to/with her now?!?!" If you get some ideas of what she would like from her, learn the how-to from old hands at local events, and have some kind of plan, maybe just an index card with a general order of actions, you should have enough confidence to pull it off with some style.
On the planning portion, I have been trying to add some me-topping-him fantasies to my personal rotation-we are LDR, so I live on memories and fantasies a lot-trying things out in my mind, imagining what I could do that I would enjoy, too, and I think that will give me a little more confidence next time it's my turn.
Good luck to you both, and have fun!

Thank you for all those suggestions! We have talked about our fantasies before and indeed we're different subs. I like it slower and more vanilla, in an intimate way with communications all the way through, and she's into pure pain that detaches her from other feelings. That part kinda makes me nervous too. ^^' Anyways we could talk more about her previous sub experience to see what she's really into, thanks for reminding me!