(long)You can't serve two Masters or three or four.... (rant/commentery/sounding off)

[spike]

But that is only my opinion.

Actually, it isn't, FF. It is a very sensible and probably commonly held one. It is certainly mine.

Spike

[PopeRozen]

it seems too difficult to pull off to me, but I'm still neo.

I definetly wonder how ppl can pull off a 24/7 lifestyle with kids. you would have to hide it from them, no? I mean it would be kinda traumatic for a child to see Daddy (or a stranger) caning Mommy in the basement. (gender roles only examples). that and its so time-consuming anyways, with proper warmups and cooldowns.

But if someone were to get serious with multiple Doms, it coud be disastrous. what if you get contradictory orders? No one person can have everything they want all the time, and it seems like you'd have to be a glutton for punishment (hahaha) to try and please more than one Dom 24/7. I even wonder how satisfying a scene with more than one sub would be. The subs I know (not many, granted) like being on the bottom, and I mean down there with the catfish. Sharing a level would make them feel awkward, as would being in the middle, and I think it would be tricky to keep two people in subspace at the same time...like running back and forth between two kitchens making 2 diffferent meals.

================================================== ================================================== ===========
WOOT WOOT, 25 POSTS BABY!
================================================== ================================================== ===========

[Finding_Fantasy]

PopeRozen,

I think that the point of the orignal post was that you have others aspects in your life that "dominante" you such as your work, your kids, and your marriage aside from the BDSM one, not having multiple BDSM partners.

That being said, living BDSM 24/7 with children, while not easy, is not impossible. You just need to work out seemingly "harmless" phrases for when you are in front of your children. Since there is much more to BDSM than simply caning and other physical elements there is other things, such as being respectful, holding yourself a certain way, wearing or saying a certain thing while you are in front of your children, thus the dominant still has control despite the presence of children. And, if the submissive has messed up, then punishment can be reserved for a more appropriate time.

[Eraser]

a few of my comments:

the original point was simply if you make a commitment to someone, keep your commitments. you could simplify it down to someone that overschedules there time yes. But the common thing I see (the last 2 girls I've taken in) had the same issue husband, work, kids. Those three things HAVE to be taken into consideration when you make your commitment.

I normally don't like taking on a girls that are married. I have made 2 exceptions and been burned twice. well fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me.

After all the posts I saw in personals of vanilla married people combinded with just happened it was just an emotional rant because I was angery. My rant was targeted yes to vanilla married subs with kids. But my point was simple. Make a commitment keep it.

24/7 with kids is difficult trust me, we only have to worry about it 3 months out of the year but its a challange. That and the pre-summer clean up is always depressing.

I've seen vanilla or even single Tops do the same thing, they have so much time with friends or social life or they have built up such a stable they don't have time they have spread themselves to thin.

[embre]

it seems too difficult to pull off to me, but I'm still neo.

I definetly wonder how ppl can pull off a 24/7 lifestyle with kids. you would have to hide it from them, no? I mean it would be kinda traumatic for a child to see Daddy (or a stranger) caning Mommy in the basement. (gender roles only examples). that and its so time-consuming anyways, with proper warmups and cooldowns.

But if someone were to get serious with multiple Doms, it coud be disastrous. what if you get contradictory orders? No one person can have everything they want all the time, and it seems like you'd have to be a glutton for punishment (hahaha) to try and please more than one Dom 24/7. I even wonder how satisfying a scene with more than one sub would be. The subs I know (not many, granted) like being on the bottom, and I mean down there with the catfish. Sharing a level would make them feel awkward, as would being in the middle, and I think it would be tricky to keep two people in subspace at the same time...like running back and forth between two kitchens making 2 diffferent meals.

================================================== ================================================== ===========
WOOT WOOT, 25 POSTS BABY!
================================================== ================================================== ===========

24/7 with kids is hard for many couples I know, but not impossible. I think many people compare 24/7 with the physical aspect of BDSM too often. 24/7 doesn't mean always being collared and naked, or spending every night in the basement being caned.
It's a relationship where the power exchange permeates every aspect of your life. It's knowing 24/7 who is in charge and living it. You don't have to have long elaborate scenes to keep that dynamic going. Heck, just having a good night of vanilla sex can be time consuming. And millions of people live that every day with kids.
As for the whole rant of having a husband and Master. I've never been able to wrap my mind around that. In theory a Master is to be the #1 person in a slave's life. And that is just not possible when said slave is married. No matter what, the husband would come first.

[Curtis]

"No matter what, the husband would come first."

In theory, yes, but in practice... It's obvious from reading around the Forum (and some personal communications) that there are a LARGE number of people who fit into Merrioc's 'two masters' category. It would seem inevitable that at least some of them put their Master/Mistress first.

[embre]

"No matter what, the husband would come first."

In theory, yes, but in practice... It's obvious from reading around the Forum (and some personal communications) that there are a LARGE number of people who fit into Merrioc's 'two masters' category. It would seem inevitable that at least some of them put their Master/Mistress first.

The more I thought about this, the more I realized that perhaps I was generalizing much in the way others do about 24/7 relationships. I was basing my idea on a very traditional marriage. And not taking into consideration the many dynamics a marriage can take on.

[magicgrl]

"I definetly wonder how ppl can pull off a 24/7 lifestyle with kids. you would have to hide it from them, no? I mean it would be kinda traumatic for a child to see Daddy (or a stranger) caning Mommy in the basement. (gender roles only examples). that and its so time-consuming anyways, with proper warmups and cooldowns."

We have four children and it's rather simple...24/7 is not all about playing. It is rare that i get whipped, caned or anyting else. 24/7 is about Dominance and submission. Master expects me to tend to our children and He knows they come first. If i did not do this He would be very angry. i serve Him by honoring Him--this means i take care of His home, His children etc. Do we hide it from them? The scenes, yes...but geez, we hide that from everyone. We can wait to play--

*~magic~*

[Eraser]

24/7 with kids is very possible and very do-able, now if the kids are not your's and the sub and the kids live out of the house, thats where it can complicate things. I do have a daughter that visits for the summer. So its not like play stops for 3 months.

[magicgrl]

24/7 with kids is very possible and very do-able, now if the kids are not your's and the sub and the kids live out of the house, thats where it can complicate things. I do have a daughter that visits for the summer. So its not like play stops for 3 months.

Exactly--we have two that live here full time (4 and 8) and two that are part time (14 and 16.) i think the children know there may be something different about us, but we are careful and use discreation. It was harder at first--when we were still new and trying to figure things out.

After the kids head off to bed we can do what we want. Our house is such that His "chambers" is upstairs, across a 2,500 sq. foot well insulated home. We are far enough away that the kids hear nothing. As far as the D/s goes, i know what my rules are--and i would be very harshly punished if i broke a rule, knowing that He could not punish me because the kids were around.

*~magic~*