As I have never been married, someone else might be more qualified to give their opinion on your situation, however here's my view on your situation for what it's worth.

Let’s forget the kinky stuff for a moment, if one person in a marriage feels something is missing in the relationship, what is that person to do? One thing is certain; a relationship can only become better if both partners in the relationship work together. You write you have already talked to your wife, however in what form did this happen? Did you stress how important this is to you? I am sure that if she realizes how important this is to you, she will give you a chance to show her how this can be enjoyable for both of you; she is your life partner after all and I am sure she wants to see you happy and fulfilled. Should she be able to tolerate the extra kink in the bedroom (but not outright like it), you might be able to compensate by doing something else that she really enjoys, that you don’t particularly like but can tolerate. Sometimes differences will have to be overcome by bargains. Should she be completely repulsed, you could perhaps ask her if she would allow you to find a partner you could enjoy this particular hobby with. You would probably need to stress that this is not shortcomings on her part, and that doing this would never diminish the feelings you have for your wife.

Should she not give you a single chance, even after you have explained your feelings, and I know this might sound tough, but then perhaps you need to consider if your relationship can survive, afterall you would then need to supress a part of yourself.
You have probably thought of all these things yourself, however this is just how I see it, hopefully some one more experienced than me will be able to give better advice than me. Marriages can be tough, and I hope you find a solution both you, and your wife can live with.